Superbowl Sunday

Yep, so there is a lot of football going on in the other room.  Since I have absolutely zero interest in whether the Saints will defeat the Colts (my opinion?  Not a chance…) I have decided to come in here instead and let you know that I am not dead.  I will assume you forgive my blogging drought- although even I am getting tired of the old “I have 3 kids, and a house, and so many activities, and am so BUUUUSSSSYYYYYY blah blah blah whine” excuse.

So, what is new?  Well, Bruce and I celebrated the big 0-6 last weekend.  Insert gasps over how old we are how many years we’ve been married.  Crazy, right?!  We certainly have accomplished a lot.  Three kids, 2 houses (and an apartment), FOUR new vehicles (3 brand-new), 2 canoes, a basement reno, a vacation to Cuba (honeymoon, but it counts!!), 2 trips to NYC, and like 100 000 km traveling around Ontario!  There are still things we want to accomplish.  To do.  To see.  With the kids, and without.

We have a trip to Halifax planned for the summer.  And maybe, if everything goes well, a trip to Taiwan in the next 2 years.

I never would have guessed, 6 years ago, that this is where we would be.  But my plans were dull and uninteresting.  I’d love some more money (who wouldn’t?!), but there isn’t anything I would change.

I love my husband.  We are in a good routine right now, and a good place overall.  I know this because I have the energy to devote to improving myself.  An activity that gets shoved aside when I go into survival mode. And, yes, the last year has been like that.  But we can see the light.

Josselyn is a new baby.  Easier to read, perhaps?  Happier overall?  Secure in her place in the family?  I don’t know.  And, frankly, I don’t care.  She is a beautiful, determined, necessary addition to our family.  Without her, something would always be missing.

I have struggled with knowing when our family is complete.  People always said you would just know.  And I do know…now.  But it wasn’t sudden, and it wasn’t expected.  I debated with myself, with Bruce, with God.  I polled my friends.  I weighed the pros and cons.  And in the end, I just knew.

So, we are done.  It took a little while to say it out loud to someone other than Bruce.  But with practice, it gets easier.  I mourn the loss of the idea of having  4 kids.  But am at complete peace with the decision to stop at 3.  Our 3 beautiful, talented, intelligent daughters will be enough for me.  More than enough, maybe, in their teen years…

I am looking forward to the Spring (perhaps a little early?) and all the newness it brings.  It will be the longest I have ever gone without being pregnant, and that is a thought that makes me happy!

What I like about you

Holly is like no other kid I know.  I can’t get enough of her.  I love that even when she is stubborn and insistent, “do by self”, she is not whiny or angry.  She’s matter-of-fact.  She’s just as likely to push you away and say, “no, mommy, by self.  Me change pants.  Me change OWN pants.  No help mommy” as she is to say, “mommy, I neeeeeeeeeeed you”.  She never screams or rages.  She likes to do things by herself to prove she is independent, but she is often proving it to Bronwyn, not me, and least of all herself.  She doesn’t have a problem doing anything for the first time, and rarely bats an eyelash when presented with new situations.  I have more of a problem keeping her by my side, than prying her off me.  My standard response to, ‘where is Holly?” is “I don’t know”!

I wrote out some rules for the girls yesterday.  They basically stated that if the girls did X, then they could earn some tv time.  It has been going well.  Either toys get put away or the tv stays off.  Either way it is win-win for me!

So Bronwyn came to me with a little slip of paper.  Pre-readers have an almost hero worship mentality toward the written word.  If you say it is written then they will not question it.  She showed me the paper.  She had “written” on it some words that she told me were new rules.  I asked her to read them to me, as my hands were full (obviously I couldn’t say I didn’t know what it said!!).  She obliged, and this is what she had written:

If Bronwyn and Holly eat all of their supper, then they may watch tv.

If Bronwyn and Holly do not eat all of their supper, then they must watch television.

Thank you

The end

She is too smart for her own good.

So so old…

I think I am getting old.  Not literally- I mean I am not even turning 30 this year.  Unlike another member of this household who shall remain nameless.  But I am feeling it.  I am just that bit stiffer, that bit fatter, and my oldest daughter starts school this year.  Yep, you heard me.  School.  Like on a bus, all day, away from me school.  It was all pretty theoretical until today when I arrived at the Early Years Centre and overheard someone talking about the “School’s Cool” kindergarten readiness program.  So I signed Bronwyn up.  And then I signed her up for a 6- week preschool program.  Then I called her future school and set a date to come in to register her for the 2010-2011 school year.

Hold me.

I just got used to having 3 kids, and now one of them is being taken away from me.  I have talked to other moms about how when their kids start kindergarten or preschool or go to daycare, there is a real change in the behaviour.  For the worse.  Am I prepared for that?  And what am I going to do all day with only 2 kids?  Maybe we should have a fourth!

Also, I’ve been thinking.  My mom and I were both the same age when we had our first kid (that would be moi), and I remember looking at her and thinking she was SO OLD.  I mean, really mom old.  Like responsible, and un-fun, and old.  Now I am that age, and I don’t feel that old.  I feel, well, like I am in my late twenties.  Granted, I don’t go out much.  And when I do, it is usually a quiet affair.  I don’t dress up for anything, and I don’t do anything spontaneous- well how can I?!  With the exception of curling (a whole year ago) I can count on one hand the number of times we hired a sitter in 2009!

Admitting to myself that Josselyn is my last baby, and starting to move our family forward has pushed me from “young mom with young kids” to “too old to start over-has a kid in SCHOOL for crying out loud-where is my career-MOTHER”.

Bring on the anti-wrinkle cream folks, I am getting old.

Making monsters out of play-doh, spaghetti, and puffed wheat- does she look old enough to go to school? I didn't think so!

Three isn’t a crowd- it is perfect!

So, while I wasn’t looking, all the kids grew up a little.

Bronwyn, who has previously run screaming from anything even remotely resembling a letter, can recite and recognize all the letters of the alphabet, as well as writing a handful of them.  Mostly the ones that are found in her name or Holly’s name.

"From Bronwyn To Holly"

She has also decided that she is old enough to dress herself.  This has been a LONG time coming (she is 3 1/2!), but I never expected how it would play out.  Bruce’s sister Marlys bought all the girls in the family the same set of purple penguin socks for Christmas.  Cute, right?  Except then she also picked out 2 identical pairs in kids’ sizes for Bronwyn and Holly.  So, needless to say, Bronwyn hasn’t taken them off yet.

I also rearranged their dresser to accommodate for their size discrepancy.  Now instead of pants in one drawer and shirts in another, pants and shirts for Holly go in one and same for B.  So, Bronwyn has started choosing her own outfits to wear too.  And, I must say, she is pretty good at it.  It helps that nearly everything is matchable, but she definitely has an eye for coordinating colours and fabrics.

Making "words" with her magnetic letters!

Holly continues to amaze me with her language skills and cooperative nature.  Last week we were at the library and the health unit was there checking everyone’s teeth.  Holly jumped right onto the table and opened wide while the hygienist counted all her teeth, and looked for cavities etc.

This morning I found her in the living room carefully drawing “H”s all over her legs with magic markers.

Holly- classic!

Josselyn continues to surprise me.  It isn’t like she is a miserable baby- she just knows what she wants and knows how to get it.  For instance, if she does not want to be left alone in the living room for a few minutes, you will hear about it!  She will eat all manner of food if it presented in small chunks that she can feed herself, but only certain foods she will allow you to feed her off a spoon.  She gets herself from one end of the crib to the other, rolling and scooting to get where she needs.  She experienced her first episode of NOT being fed in the middle of the night- I’ll keep everyone posted on how THAT goes!!

Basically, Josselyn is a perfectly pleasant baby when it suits her.  She gives up all manner of smiles and coos and babbles to friends and strangers alike.  She is extremely social and prefers to be out than napping.  Which is helpful to our schedule!

The best part about Josselyn so far that I can see, is the look she gives to Bronwyn and Holly when she catches them looking at her.  It is such a “please please please like me I will do whatever you want if you will just smile at me” expression that breaks my heart.

Has a death wish when it comes to Lamby- she can't keep her hands off him!

Safety vs Respect: Round #1

Dear Costco,

Thank you for your due diligence in reminding me what a terrible parent I am.  I really feel appreciated when I am told off by a woman who spends her whole day making sure people have their Costco cards on them before allowing them to enter the store.

I love being accosted the second I walk in the door, and before I even have my purse off my shoulder, with a barrage of demands that my three and a half year old sit down in the cart.  “They can really tip over and fall out at this age.”

At WHAT age?  She has actually be sitting for over 3 years now.  And are we talking about a canoe or a cart?  For that matter, are we talking about a child or a rambunctious puppy?  Our dog Dude was notorious for jumping out of moving vehicles.  One time (the last time in fact!) he actually fell out the window.  Of our car.  We were going 40 km/hr.  And he walked away from that.  But my preschooler is incapable of remaining in a stationary box a mere three feet off the ground.

My sister now feels compelled to spend the trip pushing the cart while holding her hands, telling her stories about riding camels, and the time I got blown into the street by a gust of wind. 

When we finally get to the cash, another nosy busybody well-meaning cashier instructs MY child to sit down. 

If you want children to sit in carts, then erect signage to that effect.  If you want to ban children from participating in any activity where they might get hurt, you may want to start with hockey.  Enough said.

Sincerely,

Not a child, but not allowed to act like an adult in a store that I pay to buy at

Here is where my blood begins to boil.  Employees of a store (that I have PAID to enter)  have no right to discipline my child.  Especially right in front of me.  This puts her in an awkward position.  On the one hand, she has been told not to talk to strangers.  She also is being told to do something that is exactly the opposite of what her mother has already allowed her to do. 

I feel that if she doesn’t sit, I am a bad parent.  And yet, I don’t want her to sit, because I don’t think she needs to, and I want to make a stand against nosy old fools who think they know more about my child than I do.  I also don’t want to teach her that she needs to obey every adult that tells her what to do.  If I have told her she must never enter a stranger’s car, yet an adult tells her she must, I want to be certain that she will obey ME, even if I am not there.  I feel I am undermining my authority (and risking her safety) by allowing her to obey contradictory rules, yet I cringe at the idea of her disrespecting other adults.

I was unprepared for this scenario, but rest assured that the next kind soul who tries this manuever on me and mine, will receive an earful they never saw coming.

Anybody have a similar story?

Dr Seuss is a rhyming genius

Christmas was pretty good this year.  I had very little expectations, which always helps, but even despite my gloomy outlook on how the week would go, it was better than I could have hoped.  Well, except for the last part (but that is a story for another time).  The girls have been well-behaved.  They aren’t sleeping enough, but they are eating lots, so I’ll take it!  Now that they are getting older, I am able to do suff other than be a couch for them to sit on.  I can help in the kitchen.  I can play with kids who aren’t mine.  and I can participate in the Howarth family Annual PIG competition.  Of course, considering my deplorable ping-pong skills, I am allowed to play HIPPOPOTAMUS.  I still lost.

We all received some very nice presents, but Bruce’s favourite was the new truck he bought for himself, to replace the Vibe.  I still shake my head when I think that we now own a truck.  I never thought we ever would.  But Bruce is happier than a tornado in a trailer park (quick name that movie!  second clue: we watch it daily).  His only regret is that he had to leave it in Sudbury since it wasn’t ready to drive home just yet. 

Bronwyn has been really cute lately- wishing everyone she sees a Happy new Year.  Even today, three days in.

She also makes anyone who is silly enough to get into a sitting position, read to her from her Hop on Pop book.  She can “read” nearly the whole thing by herself.  The best page?  “My father can read big words, too.  Like Constantinople and Timbukto”.  Precious!!!

So, hope everyone is having a great new year, and that 2010 brings fewer surprises than 2009.

Full circle

My mom admitted to me on the phone this morning that she couldn’t find a gift she thought she purchased for my sister.  “I thought I bought three things but I can only find two.  And now I am wondering if I even bought the third thing, or just dreamed it, because I can’t even remember what it was!”

As I gently laughed at her, inside I was rolling on the floor.  How could she LOSE a present?  And not even remember what it was supposed to be?!?!?

Later this morning I went to the laundry room to put in a new load of clothes (or reboot the laundry as FLYlady puts it!!), and as I shoved the wet ones into the dryer I noticed something was off.  Why didn’t they smell all Gain-freshness-y?  Where was the Apple Mango Tango scent?  And why did they smell like… pee?!  Could it be that I forgot to put soap into the washing machine when I turned it on this morning? 

Apparently I am not so unlike my mother after all. 

Which, except the chronic losing things, isn’t such a bad thing.

Me and my mom

28 years later...

Christmas Memories

Christmas is in only a few days, and I am starting to get nostalgic already.  I asked Elaine to pick up another roll of craft paper for our easel.  They bought it for the girls last Christmas, and that prompted me to find this clip, made by Ryan, of Bronwyn’s response to her gift.  Enjoy:

Forgive me if you’ve heard this one!

So, my friend Joan threw down a challenge today.  Apparently she had a bird incident recently.  When I commented that I too had a funny bird story, she challenged me to a “blog off”.  So, read my post, read hers, and comment here.  Most comments wins, but I would love to have you all choose a winner based on how funny the stories are!

I actually thought I had blogged about this already, but I can’t find it, so here goes…

One day I went downstairs and heard some rustling.  I don’t remember exactly when this was, or why I didn’t investigate sooner, but I probably figured Bruce would take care of it when he got home.  Unfortunately, by the time he got home, and I remembered to tell him there was a weird rustling, it was too late to do anything anyway.  The next day, I got a little curious.  I headed over to the woodstove for a little look-see and what do I see?  A black bird sitting in the stove!!  We stared at each other for about an hour before I gathered my wits and slammed the door.  And then I locked it.  And then I called Bruce. 

“Did you know there is a bird in the woodstove?!?!?” 

“Oh sure, I figured.”

“WHAT?!  And you didn’t TELL me, or warn me, or even, you know, CLOSE THE DOOR PROPERLY?!?!”

“I’ll take care of it…”

Except he didn’t, because that night we went out somewhere.  So now the bird is nearing like 36 hours in our woodstove, with no food and no water. 

“At least he’ll be easy to catch” Bruce quips.

In the end, Bruce did get the bird out of the woodstove.  And all I did was provide the pillow case.  You know, because Bruce doesn’t actually know where we keep the pillow cases.  I do this on purpose so he has an excuse to keep me around.

Bucket List

I have been a little inspired, after reading some other blogs, to write my own “top 100 things to do before I die” list. Some have been accomplished, so they are stroked out.  However, since I am not yet 30, and therefore feel that deciding RIGHT now to do 100 things seems short-sighted, I will continue to update it.  So, in no particular order:

1.  Visit Italy with Bruce

2.  Have 4 children

3.  Celebrate my 60th wedding anniversary

4.  Weigh 125 lbs

5.  See all my children’s children

6.  See Bronwyn saved

7.  See Holly saved

8.  See Josselyn saved

9.  See my other chil(ren) saved

10.  See Jenn saved

11.  Be a top organizer in a major event

12.  Get my NP certificate

13.  Go on a missions trip

14.  Own my home outright

15.  Learn to sew

16.  Learn to knit

17.  Train a dog

18.  Run 10 km

19.  Run a half-marathon

20.  Run all the way up our hill

21.  Explore Costa Rica with Bruce

22.  Take the kids whitewater canoeing with Bruce

23.  Go scuba diving/snorkelling in the Great Barrier Reef with Bruce

24.  See the Grand Canyon with my family

25.  Meet someone famous

26.  Sing the national anthem at a sporting event/ceremony

27.  Set foot in every province (BC, Alberta, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, Ontario, Quebec, New Brunswick)

28.  Swim with the salmon

29.  Go rock-climbing

30.  Rappel off a 100 ft cliff in the middle of the night with no lights (ok, so I never really ALWAYS wanted to do this, but I DID, and am counting it!)

31.  Go to the Olympics

32.  Save someone’s life

33.  Deliver a baby (not mine!)

34.  Donate 100 units of blood

35.  See a Broadway show

36.  See the Northern Lights

37.  See the following animals in the wild: moose, deer, bear, polar bear, lion, elephant, camel, tiger

38.  Pay off my student loans

39.  Take a trip by train with Bruce

40.  Write my will

41.  Spend New Year’s Eve in Times Square

42.  Visit a vineyard and sample the wine

43.  Design and build a home (not personally build though)

44.  Go surfing

45.  Take a year and follow the Raptor’s to every game with Bruce

46.  Host an annual party

47.  Have a garage sale

48.  Donate some part of myself (MAY have to wait until I have actually died…!)

TO BE CONTINUED…